What's really nice is OCD is really something that you can work through. It's something that there are practices that you can do that can help you overcome your obsessive compulsive desire, and there is a light at the end of the tunnel, and there's help for you. So reach out, ask people about it, you're not alone.
You can do it. It's not the easiest thing in the world to live with but it is manageable and millions of other people have the same struggle as you do. I remember I always thought growing up I was a psychopath, like straight up. I just thought I was insane, like having these terrible thoughts all the time and like having to do all these things exactly perfectly and it's like, it was killing me, like quite literally. I got to the point about last year where I like, I wanted to kill myself. I did not want to exist anymore. I just wanted it all to end but the one of the best days of my entire life was going to a doctor and getting help and finding out what's actually wrong.
Here's the thing, OCD is really hard, but I also know that you can do it, that you're gonna be okay, because I'm okay, and at one point in my life I was in such a low spot that some nights I would pray and ask God to let me die in my sleep. Like, I didn't want to kill myself, I didn't want to commit suicide, and I wasn't gonna go run in front of a car or anything, but I almost just wanted to cease to exist. Like, I was honestly in the pit of despair, and here I am now, and I'm happy, and it's taken a while to get here, but like, with the right treatment, with knowing what was going on, with an amazing support group, and with knowing of God's love for me, like, I live a happy life, and I know that you can too. You really can. Believe it.
The best thing that you could do if you have OCD is to tell other people and not to keep it to yourself because you think there's some kind of shame attached to it. It's not you, it's the OCD. It's part of the brain that works differently and you share that condition with millions of people across the world. Instead of seeing it as a handicap, see it as something that you could turn to great strength. Don't sit on it, don't keep quiet about it, make sure you share your experiences with others because you're not alone.
In spite of the brutality of its torment, there is much hope and help today for OCD than there ever has been. Back when I was, when my disorder first serviced in 1984, there was nothing known about obsessive compulsive disorder besides excessive hand washing. Nobody would ever want to come out and talk about the intrusive terrifying thoughts that they were having. Now, it is more and more, as we've gotten more and more advanced in our knowledge of the disorder, more people are coming out and saying, hey, I've suffered for years in silence. And I will say that in this day and age we're living in, the treatment for OCD and finding a cure looks brighter than it ever has been.
So one thing to know is that there are specific strategies to deal with OCD and once you know how to do them and employ them, you know, quite a few times then it'll, it'll lessen quite a bit, which, which helped me a ton, you know, and now even when it comes back, I know that there are ways to deal with it, you know, I know I'll get to a place again where, where I won't have to deal with it as much and I'll feel a lot better about it. So you can do it.
Just keep going and don't give up. Don't give up hope because just understand that it's a condition that you share with millions of people across the globe and it's nothing to be ashamed of, it's nothing to be frightened of, it's just something you understand and be curious about how your brain works as somebody with OCD because it's different to people who don't have OCD. But keep going and celebrate your achievements as well. Celebrate little wins every day, whether that's breaking the habit of checking the taps, breaking the habit of checking the front door. Start small and then just keep going. Persevere.